do you really belong to me poem

 Do u really belong to me, 

The stars and universe made it possibly clear

That i cant always have u near

That ur the impossibility

That i tried to make into reality

Until i became way too clingy

But u cant deal with this, can we

We cant deal with this a bit,

We just stroll off into the park a bit

Im just here waiting saying 

Same words like i havent been saying

Speaking same ghostly images

That are in my mind that make sense through time

But not in this realm, not fine

Not how i imagined life, i tried

Not what i believed in my trouble

Cause i thought trouble was made for u to go through

I thought it was put there to speak to

And take, avoid, and make, a toy, and say , a ploy

And shake it up like im up to it to break

Im for it, im up in stakes and im selling it

My speech i thought i had more words than this

But here they are, they are amiss

And here i am, barely awake like i know not

How soon this will take, how much i will make

A conundrum about it, i almost forgot what to say

The words in my mind get stuck in space

And dont let the words flow from there to my mouth

And then im amazed that i can even speak

Cause i was just having a hard to reach

Place in my thoughts i was thinking i bought

A whole essay on this but i really contribute

All of this to you, the ones that made me feel blue

The ones that took me outa the red

The ones that showed themselves as targets themselves

Im not as low as u but i could stoop so low just to scoop u out

And then without a doubt control the outcomes that come about

And waver in them and settle with sense

And bond over everything that makes it tragic

I wanted the drama i wanted the pity

I wanted u to see right into me, with me

I want u to take my hand so i could pull u into my soul

It hasnt grown cold, its just icy til it gets warm

And now im exploding im boiling with glee

Didnt u all want me to show u the real me

Well here i am, rejoice in consequence

Connect me with ur intercom i have so much to learn

But so much to teach  i have a degree in babbling

I can say so much that dont make sense in code

But only those, insane as me can appreciate the insane in me

And remain as can be, im myself and perfect this way

I can not be any other way, so take, this and take only this

And dont pull too hard or youll open me up when im not ready

Oh ur hands not steady, oh u tore it up, well  here comes

This, 

Whatever u can do to deal with it

Do it now before i scream too loud

Before i seek to compromise myself

Or is it sacrifice my shell

Or is it just deny my wealth

Or is it all of these and all else

That will come about til i crowd around my tells

And tell everyone my tells, and tell everyone my stories

Till they get so boring, but i wanted no normalcy here

I wanted boring but not for it to splatter on me

I was fun as can be, i was stuck up as can be within me

If not without me, then what can i do wen im not surrounded by me

Im just surrounded by you, and im not feeling content

Just want to regret and reject anything that touches me

Lunges at me, i lunge back full force

Up to me and im creeping past the back door

And there is no more, he’ll save me from myself

Cause i was given away to the devil himself

I was given and taken and been ridden off

To a higher place that i can only see from above